I quit the pill. Five days ago, five days into my cycle, I stopped altogether. And guess what? I've been sleeping well ever since. Not amazing, not terrible, but well. And well is wonderful. I'm starting to feel like I'm coming to life instead of managing a state of feeling half dead.
I'm really hoping this is the beginning of the end of my walk through insomniac hell. I don't suppose I can or should go back to my nearly 3-cup-per-day coffee habit -- decaf after my first cup will have to do. But I'm feeling less paranoid about going to sleep in the first place, which I'm sure is half the battle.
The next decision is what to do in the meantime. I'll be 45 this year, so the prospect of having another seems downright foolhardy (not to mention that our incredibly active and energetic toddler kind of makes up for it). Something permanent? Something temporary? Eh, just one more thing to work out.
Meanwhile, we finally have an offer on the condo. We won't celebrate until closing, which is more than a month away, but I'm choosing optimism in the meantime.