random thoughts: accept each other to love one another

I have come to understand that it is easier to accept people the way they are when I accept the fact that it's not up to me to change them. That, in turn, makes it easier to love people right where they are.

toddler tip - t shirt as pajamas

My son's been pretty cranky about getting dressed for school (or anything else) lately. I decided this week that, especially since he doesn't have many short sleeved pajama shirts, I just put him in tomorrow's t shirt to sleep in. I'd do it with the shorts too, if it weren't for the diaper thing.

One less battle.

recovering from family visits and why my husband is father of the year

My MIL stayed with us for two weeks. It was a good visit. We spent time together, she had plenty of quality time with the boy, and we didn't get too worked up over anything. The boy was thrilled to haver her around -- enough so that, toward the end, his sleeping habits became erratic. It would take over an hour of taking him back to bed and getting him to settle down, long after the bedtime stories and lullabies and tuck-in had happened. Naptime started to get just as hard. It ruffled my feathers to say the least.

Once she went back home, it still took a couple days to get back to normal. I think we’ve now recovered from my MIL’s visit. Bedtime is still kind of a battle, but at least he’s going down the first time instead of continually getting up.

Last night I just about blew my top – he didn’t want a bath, wouldn’t let me help him put on his nighttime diaper or jammies, refused tooth brushing completely by screaming at me… I finally yelled "That's it! You're in time out!!" and went into the other room where DH was standing. I walked past him and pounded my fists into the bed to let out some anger while our son continued to scream and cry in his room. It wasn’t a pretty scene. I was so frustrated I wanted to scream and cry myself.

Fortunately for all of us, DH took over. He went into the boy's room and shut the door. I went and sat on the couch with my head in my hands, feeling like an idiot for losing my temper. The boy continued to cry and scream for several minutes, but DH didn't give up. He stayed in there, rocking the boy in the rocking chair and just holding him until he finally settled down. Eventually the boy settled down enough that he let DH tuck him into bed -- something he has demanded exclusively from Mommy for the past two weeks -- and actually went to sleep.

And that is why my imperfect, ever-evolving, back-aching, long-suffering husband of 13 years (as of next week) is Father of the Year. This one's for you, honey.

top 5 signs my son is ready for potty training

Yesterday, DH and I decided that this coming Friday is Training Day. We (uh.. that really means me since he's working) are going to potty train the boy. Below is a list of the top 5 signs we know our toddler is ready for potty training.

1. He wants to help me by being in the room, trying to wipe me with tissue way before I'm ready, and flushing the toilet for me. Hey, I'm not shy about letting him get to know the ropes.
2. He plays with the integrated toilet seat and enjoys putting little bits of tissue in there, then flushing to watch it go down.
3. He doesn't want me to change him when he's got a number 2, but then he wants to wipe himself as soon as I get started (I haven't given him the opportunity to play with the contents but I'm sure he would).
4. He investigates the area with a finger.
5. The other day, we put him in his room for naptime. According to the evidence, he apparently took off his diaper, peed in front of his bed, then went to sleep naked below the waist on his bed where we found him 2 hours later. If that's not a sign, I don't know what is.

I bought a book with over 300 5-star reviews (Toilet Training in Less Than a Day) and am building a short shopping list:

• A doll that wets
• An extra stool for the downstairs bathroom
• A second integrated toilet seat for the downstairs bathroom
• A variety of tasty drinks, treats, and candies
• Special stickers
• Big-boy briefs
• A special reward for mommy to be enjoyed at the end of the day

I'm totally intimidated. Isn't that silly? It's such a big milestone and I've heard so many stories that I assume it will be difficult and last months. I could be wrong. But I'm more afraid of missing this glaringly obvious window of opportunity. Lord help me. :)

remember who is in charge of your child

I just ran across a blog post talking about a mother's experience at a doctor's office, where she encountered a note saying that a doctor or nurse would spend 5 minutes talking to her child alone -- without any parent present. As she later found out, this time would not be to determine if the child has been abused. Oh no. This is to talk to the child about sex and drugs and offer free assistance like abortion counseling and condoms.

WTF?

Not only this, but apparently in this glorious state, the 12-17 year old children have online access to their medical records which they can block from their parents.

Again. WTF?

I don't remember giving birth to a ward of the state. I'm pretty sure my son is his parents' responsibility and, while a few years ago this would barely have been a blip on my radar, you can bet this mama bear will do everything in her power to keep parental authority where it should be, which is complete and intact.

I cannot tell you how much this angers and deeply disturbs me. I can only imagine what a bleeped-up society my son will encounter when he turns 12 in another decade. Until that happens, I better step up my game and keep tabs on what political people think they should control in my family's life. It's also a strong reminder of how and why it's so critical to continually build a strong, positive, and open connection with my son. You never know who might try to erode it.

random thoughts: sick again?

I can’t believe I just did this: shut my office door and laid down under my desk for about 10 minutes where I dozed off and on. I think I have a virus that my son passed on – he was sick from both ends for half a day Sunday. We thought he overate the day before because he was fine the rest of the day. Me? Not so much.

I need to go home.

random thoughts: does anyone over 40 get eight hours of sleep?

I used to have trouble going to sleep. Now I just wake up about an hour and a half too early. Sometimes I think I just can't win and I'll die of exhaustion. Sigh. Maybe it's a sign of the times -- the times being too old to get enough sleep.